Sunday, June 15, 2014

You looking bro?

After months of contemplating starting a blog, I've finally pulled the trigger.  In a sea of anonymous 'closet homo' and 'gay bro' themes, I imagine my perspective and my thoughts on here will overlap with a lot of the sentiments you'll read on other blogs.  That said, I hope my ramblings offer some insightful takeaways for others who might be in the same position as I am (I am not a unique snowflake).  But ultimately, this is for me--an outlet for the ruminations that I'd rather not bore my friends with.

I'm 25.  Left home to live in a big city.  I have a good job, a healthy social life and a corporate discount at my local gym.  I began the arduous process of coming out about a year ago, taking my sweet ass time with telling the people in my life.  A handful knows I'm into dudes, and I'm sure plenty more suspect something's up.  Like every other guy on Grindr, I'm #masc...I drink beer and whiskey, use monikers like "bro" and "dude" in everyday conversation, lift weights and am often referred to as a bro.

But there's a lot more to me than that, bro.  And that's part of what inspired me to start No, Not Looking.  If you love the occasional sweaty romp like I do, you're familiar with the cadence of the words "looking" and "not looking".  The former--looking to fuck.  The latter--not looking to fuck, no real agenda and possibly, looking for something more substantial.

So that's me.  Not looking for something mundane--but looking for more...clarity on my own life, perspective on what it's like for a gay dude who doesn't define himself by sexuality and an understanding of why the fuck I (and countless others) think so much about being a homo, and why sometimes it even bothers me.

So here we go.

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